So, welcome to the third installment of what is probably the most consistent column on this site: “Fucked-Up Week.” The truth is, the consistency here is no joke - I’m diligently trying to cram a ton of events into roughly the same time frame
And the real win in this contest is that you get at least one consistent day off each week. By the way, I lost this week because on this lovely Sunday evening we were setting up our booth at the Expo
It looks like I'm trying to shove half of my tasks into a pretty tight ass. And please don’t confuse this with the terminology, or the reader might get the impression that we’re generally normal here
No way. No fucking way
In between those three days at ChangeNOW, I somehow managed to squeeze in the launch of a new healthcare program at Station F. And there was more to it than that - not to mention that this afternoon I helped a project get off the ground and provided consulting, plus I have meetings for other projects scheduled here and there, and, if all goes well, a manager from Microsoft is waiting to talk to me, whom I should also meet with, preferably before I leave for Germany
There’s a great expression in Russian that describes life - it goes something like this (though I’m not sure I can translate it correctly into English) - but usually, when someone asks, “How’s life?” we reply, “It’s in full force, and everything’s coming down on my head.”
I’d love to say, “I’m a kitty, and I’ve got paws,” but things move so fast that what you usually hear is, “Just get the fuck on with it
Well, there you have it. Another thing about last week is that, first of all, I can’t for the life of me remember what exactly I did on any given day, and second, I don’t remember how it went at all. Yeah, there are some fragmented moments that have stuck in my memory, but otherwise it’s like it never even happened. Just boom, and it’s a new Monday
That’s why this issue’s text feels more like me just needing to get things off my chest than the structure of the previous two, but that’s exactly what this column is for. And probably also for those who still think a startup is just some kind of game you play with business. No, it’s a damn abyss of responsibility, and not just in terms of the technical side, as it is for me, for example. There are also a lot of wonderful things you need to think about, and ideally, you should be able to do all of this at the same time
Long story short. I've said my piece
There’s one more thing that really screwed us over this week. A while back, back when I wasn’t posting on this site as regularly, our startup won the “Made in 92” contest (more details at the link on our website)
But even if we win, it’ll only get us into the finals (or the next round) - I still haven’t quite figured out how it all works, but I have a feeling it’s just as bad as always. But more on that later. Anyway, this week we had to do another pitch in front of the jury. The pitch was in French, which isn’t exactly a walk in the park for me yet, so I’m just here as an observer or to answer questions if any come up. But here’s the thing: according to the rules, you have 2 minutes for the pitch. But also, by the rules, you get a 30% time bonus because French isn’t your native language, so as a foreigner, you’re allowed a little more time than a native speaker
But fuck, the French wouldn't be French if they did everything by the book. First off, the host started the timer BEFORE we even began our pitch, without even giving us a chance to properly check the sound. The slide hadn’t been switched to our presentation. And as the cherry on top of this cake of shit and disorganization, there was the sound of a fucking siren signaling the end of time. A siren. They couldn’t figure out anything smarter than that. It’s nerve-wracking enough as it is, and then this happens
After that, we had a conversation about how we always tell everyone that, sure, we have a business in France, and France has done a lot of good things for us. But. As soon as it comes to serious issues - that’s when everything starts to go to hell. I feel like the number of times we’ve had to explain to various French organizations and investors what we actually do here is beyond counting. Seriously, though, it seems to me that despite all the talk of equality, the issue of women’s health and the funding of such projects basically exists in a world of its own. Although I think we can recall a classic saying here: “What is dead cannot die.”
At some point, you can’t help but compare this to the story of how we got into the program in Germany. It took the jury just 15 minutes and a few questions to decide to accept us - to provide us with money, housing, and a scholarship on top of that. And you don’t owe them anything at all. Yes, there are a couple of issues, but they’re manageable. Come, and we’ll give you everything you need to develop your projects. That’s the part I just don’t get at all
But I guess I got a little carried away with my whining, even though I said at the beginning of this post that I don’t remember the past week. But apparently a couple of things really stuck with me, so here I am. I said what I had to say
All in all, what can I say - see you at ChangeNOW, if fate brings you there, or maybe somewhere else in Paris; I’ll still be around until April 12
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